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Tuesday 29 January 2013

The me-as-god mentality in marriage


Those who have adopted a contracepting mentality have created a me-as-god mentality.

This may sound harsh, but the mark of a real Christian and a real Catholic is obedience despite not understanding. So many who contracept only see the negativity of having to not have sex when they want it, rather than the large picture of God's invitation to the married couple to pro-create life with Him.

What an invitation!

The me-as-god mentality goes like this:

I can decide whether to be open to life or not.

I can decide to have only two or three children because of finances.

I can decide to have only one or two children because of my career.

And, so on.

The first decision is based on a misunderstanding of the marriage act, which must always, in order to be a true expression of love, be open to life. True love has no boundaries, no limitations. When we love someone, we give that person our all. Holding back any part of ourselves is saying, I love you but not all of me. "I am giving you myself, but not all of me."

To me, true love is the sacrifice of one's expectations and dreams for the sake of the other. Hopefully, those expectations and dreams overlap. God is part of the relationship between two married people. God must integral in that relationship or it is not true love, as God is Love. There is no end of love, real love. See the mini-series on the Pope's encyclical, also tagged.

Those people who have the desire and ability to give of themselves, to die to self and enter into a loving relationship based on trust and hope, will find God.

To be continued...