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Wednesday 12 June 2013

A comment on the 3ps

Anita made a great comment on the last post of yesterday on the 3Ps. Here is her comment. She is a lawyer.

May I add one thing? Ladies, if a man asks you to move in and shack up, he is NOT NOT NOT a protector. That guy is a jerk by definition and you should have nothing to do with him. The whole point of living together without getting married is precisely to be able to walk away from both it and whatever comes of it. You will not get him to marry you by moving in (or, as most often happens, moving him in to your place, while you pay the bills). Nor will you get him to marry you by having his children. And, although this is purely anecdotal, most of the domestic violence cases I see working in the criminal justice system are people living in concubinage. So, to recap: a man who asks you to be his concubine is by definition either a Peter Pan or a predator, and not a protector. Period.